Dreams

        Did you ever have a dream? Not one while sleeping, but a wakeful, life changing, hopeful dream? When I was a child I dreamed of being a veterinarian. Helping animals and being surrounded by kittens all day long. That’s the life for me, now I would add puppies to the mix but otherwise still a pretty fine dream. But that dream was dashed in the 10^th grade when dissecting animals. I was okay with the worm, but lost it over the frog and rat. Poor things were breed for science (although thinking back now I prefer lab rats to sewer rats, you never what they could have) and I felt horrible dissecting them. It didn’t help that my lab partner was a psycho who decided to go all Reservoir Dogs on the poor mammal. Like the little guy’s life was terrible enough, some teenage dillhole had to take his ear.

        So then I thought the stage would be my place. I had acted in several shows and was a stage hand for many more but I am not Hollywood built or classically beautiful. So what’s a girl to do? Plastic surgery is just not in my budget right now. :P

        After university during the years of three jobs to make ends meet, the dream then became to have one job that compensated me well enough that I could pay all my bills and have saving. Not working weekends, a plus. A job where you only working 40 hours a week, a real plus.  Benefits, you better believe a major plus. A  Pension, that’s gold.  As I have touch on previous, being happy in the position was not part of the plan, the dream. I guess maybe I thought that if I had a better quality of life even a mundane job would be enough. I was wrong. Having no real meaning in life is weighing heavily on me. Does everyone feel this way now? I am just the last one to realized and accept it?

        My mother told me the other day that she thought more people were resentful in their jobs. We were in a Michael’s craft store, the staff wasn’t very helpful and mom informed me why she thought people didn’t take pride in their jobs anymore. That because they went to university (she was sure if you looked at the resumes of the people working you would find that at least one went to university), became educated and then got stuck in jobs with people who just graduated from high school more people seem to be dissatisfied. They believe they can do better and hate that they are not doing so. What do you think? Is my mom right? She says in her day less people went on in school so the ones that did got the better jobs. Less people were resentful because they didn’t except to do better than the job they were hired for. They expected those who went to college to get the better jobs so it was less of a blow. Also apparently it was easier to work your way up back then. But who knows? Remember she walked to school uphill both ways.

        Now for something completely different, Macey the Kitten!